Last night I didn't go to sleep. We watched the super bowl ( which didn't end until after 3 am due to the time difference), checked out of our hostel, and hopped on a plane back to Dublin. I'm running on three hours of sleep and both mentally and physically embracing my inner creature. Regardless, I can't stop smiling when I think about the past few days. It has truly been the best weekend I've had this semester. It's a blur, but here is my best attempt:
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| Hyde Park Hostel...saying our goodbyes |
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Thursday Night: Arrival and Induction into Hyde Park Hostel
After a 55 min flight from Dublin to Stansted and a 1 hour bus ride from Stansted to our hostel, we were finally home. And by "home" I mean a terrifying place called "Hyde Park Hostel." Hyde Park Hostel is both the most disturbing and entertaining place of which I have ever called "home." Therefore, it deserves its own section (see below). As we opened the door to room 52, which held 21 people in triple-decker bunks I can only liken to stacked coffins, I immediately regretted not splurging for the 15 euro per night hostel down the street. The people who filled the bunks weren't the friendly backpacking college students with whom I had imagined I would be sharing a room. Quite the contrary: Here is a brief break-down of the colorful residents of room 52 in the Hyde Park Hostel. No description is adequate in accurately conveying the odd mixture of fear, disgust and amusement experienced by all involved. Enjoy:
- Stinky Lady
- Stinky lady was the first person I had the pleasure of meeting after my arrival to HPH. Naturally, she was in the bunk below me and offered me her extra blanket. I refused, but to my horror found the blanket on me later that evening. Although she didn't tuck me in ( see: Bald Man) it was equally horrifying. Stinky lady appears to be a semi-regular customer at HPH Monday through Thursday. She enjoys coughing, sharing blankets, and seductively laying on her bunk. Maybe she had a good heart? She didn't speak English, so we'll never know.
- Bald Man
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| Zach, Bald Man, Dan |
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| Can't believe it's really him! |
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| Reenactment |
- Bald man slept in the bunk across the room from me on the bottom of the three beds. Bald man is best known for the infamous "tuck-in" of Thursday night, or "The Tuck seen 'round the World". At 4:30 AM on the morning of Friday, February 2nd, bald man awoke, removed his own blanket from his person, and proceeded to very gently yet thoroughly tuck Dan into bed. I witnessed the whole thing, as I was too scared to sleep. Bald man dabbles in construction, not speaking English, and is friends with Stinky Lady. Pictures to follow.
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- Bad Man
- Arguably the King of the Freak Show, bad man was a on the top bunk dweller just one row over from my bed. To be fair, any bunk would have been too close in proximity to my own. We were first introduced to Bad Man after his interaction with Lauren on the second day:
- Bald Man: "What is your name?"
- Lauren (with hesitation): "Lauren."
- Bad Man: "Oh, I want to remember you."
- THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED. Just minutes later, he popped his head out from behind his bunk and named every single one of us. I had never even spoken one word to him (none of us had except for Lauren just moments ago... Apparently he had been ease-dropping all day and had been keeping track of all of our names. Terrifying. He also has soul-less eyes..so that's good. Bad Man's hobbies include wearing suits, building a fort over his bunk, and secretly peaking out from behind his sheets.
- Porno
- Friday night, Pam decided that she no longer wanted to sleep in her bunk. Oh Pam, what a mistake...wah. When she awoke on Saturday, (with no recollection of moving) she lifted up her sheets and found a porn mag. Pam: "Is that ass real?" Classic. Although having no way to prove its origin, we have a very strong feeling it was Porno man. Pam decided it was best to just go with it, and slept in that bunk for the remainder of the weekend. Although finding the mag. was bad enough, her old bunk was located between Bad man and Hairy man ( more on him later), so it was a sound call.
- Meth Massager
- Meth massager and I were introduced in the hallway the first night. I was trying to find a bathroom in order to brush my teeth and to my delight, I was alone with this creature in the hallway. He literally had no teeth and tried to tell me that he was a masseuse. Right. He then asked me if I wanted a massage with the stipulation of "tonight only." #girlproblems. Thankfully Zach was exiting the room at that moment and walked into the hallway... Never walk alone in the hall in HPH... lesson learned.
- Hairy Man
- Although Hairy Man and I never had a conversation, I feel as though we really hit it off. Every single morning, he would get up, stretch, stare, and pace in the room. I was awake for all of this ( again, couldn't sleep). Hair man slept on the bottom bunk of the three bunks next to mine ( I really was located in a prime spot...) Hairy Man was also spotted outside the hostel in Spar. He entered Spar, walked to the counter, stared at the cashier for a few seconds only to turn around and leave. I'd say he was simply a lost soul. Oh, and he was obscenely hairy which only added to his amazing personality.
Detailed list of every day to follow... I just had to get this out before I forgot it all...the Creatures of HPH deserve to be recognized.
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| Seeking higher ground for safety and drink |
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